Judgment & Generosity – Like Oil & Water

October 14, 2019, By: Dana Cramer

“Freely you have received, freely give.” Matthew 10:8

The antithesis of generosity is judgment. We talk of CR as being a safe place; not just in terms of anonymity and confidentiality, but also in terms acceptance and freedom from judgment. When working with another, sometimes we can get confused in how we are helping them. I want to share with you lessons I learned about judging, from the book “How People Grow” by Cloud and Townsend.


  • See self as superior—see ourselves as less sinful, or worse—beyond sin. We play God.
  • Condemning—producing shame and guilt, holding someone to the Law—perfection.
  • We set the standard for someone (our view of how things should be for them).

Discernment (Evaluation):

  • See ourselves as equal to another, acknowledging our own sin nature (Humility).
  • Supportive and compassionate (Forgiveness.
  • Provide a standard that is God centered—calling each other to repentance (Correction).

If I am looking down on someone or holding someone to my standards of how and where they should be in recovery, I am in judgement. And the relationship I have will not be based on true acceptance of them (acceptance leads to true generosity to them), instead it will be conditional, problematic and hurtful. Take seriously your recovery relationships (all relationships), and when in doubt of where you stand with someone, ask the question: Am I practicing discernment or judgement?

Strive to be authentic, know the truth, test the truth, and love the truth.

If you’re stuck in a hurt, habit or hang-up, try a CR 12-step group. We have new Men’s and Women’s groups that just started and they are open.

God loves you, Jesus died for you, His spirit lives in you! Say Yes to Jesus and live Love!

Dana Cramer // Celebrate Recovery at Crossroads Church

Celebrate Recovery at Crossroads Church Calendar
October 14-20, 2019

Friday, October 18: Lesson Night

  • 6pm: Join us for dessert and fellowship prior to our large group meeting.
  • 6:30pm: Please join us for an hour of worship and recovery message.
  • 7:30pm: Open Share Groups.
  • 8:30pm: Solid Rock Café.