Circle of Influence

January 13, 2020, By: Dana Cramer

“No one lights a lamp and then covers it with a washtub or shoves it under the bed. No, you set it up on a lamp stand so those who enter the room can see their way. We’re not hiding things; we’re bringing everything out into the open. So be careful that you don’t become misers…generosity begets generosity.” Luke 8:16-19 (MSG)

In Celebrate Recovery, you will hear a lot of talk about control issues such as domination, power, manipulation, oppression and abuse, to name a few. In fact, the very first questions we tackle in our 12-step group studies are about what we really have control over. It’s obvious there is a huge difference between controlling others versus influencing others. One is destructive and the other is empowering.  One is about playing God and the other is about releasing to God.

From a family perspective, we need to be in control mode when the babies and young ones are totally dependent on us. The adolescent years arrive and you think you’re in control, but really? Then our kids become adults and all attempts at controlling their lives are futile and inadvisable—you’ve got to let go or they will let go of you in a pathological way. What I learned as my kids became adults is that attempting to control their lives was pushing them away and what I had to accept was my role as an influencer; I call it the circle of influence because as adults we influence each other all the time.

I am acutely aware that my grown daughters still watch their mother and me. That sounds frightening to some, but it is a reality for most I would think. As a Christian man/woman and father/mother and grandparent, what I think our kids are looking for is ongoing validation that we practice what we preach, we walk the talk, and we live our lives under God’s influence and behave with a heart filled with Jesus. We love them, help them, affirm them, and grow with them; we encourage them to seek God and develop a relationship with Jesus and pass that on to their families as well.  Being a living example of God’s love has more influence than anything else we can do.

“Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions.” 1 John 3:18

If you’re stuck in a hurt, habit, or hang-up, check out Celebrate Recovery at Crossroads Church. We meet every Friday night, starting at 6pm.

Dana Cramer // Celebrate Recovery at Crossroads Church


Celebrate Recovery at Crossroads Church Calendar
January 13-19, 2020

Friday, January 17: Lesson Night

  • 6pm: Join us for dessert and fellowship prior to our large group meeting.
  • 6:30pm: Please join us for an hour of worship and a recovery message.
  • 7:30pm: Open Share Groups.
  • 8:30pm: Solid Rock Café.